The unstoppable Vanderzalm machine is rolling through Vancouver this week and The Zalm is out to do some Zalmdamage to the Liberals and their despised H.S.T as his supporters grow and the Zalm grows ever closer to steamrolling over the corrupt Liberal regime in Victoria.
That’s how the press release should read if anyone cared to ask me but of course nobody did…fools.
Yes no one likes Campbell and everyone detests the H.S.T but the main thing here is that the person who started the province wide rally against both, former premier Bill Vanderzalm, should make the most out of his exciting last name.
He has a V and a Z in his surname, alone those are powerful sounding consonants but together – Vandamage!
Sigh, apparently no one else is as excited about hard consonants as I am, but they should be, because Vanderzalm, believe or not, is gathering significant support as people can’t help but flock to his no nonsense populism, especially when compared to the dual automatons Carole James and Gordon Campbell.
Campbell is currently 18 points down in the polls but by all accounts completely nonplussed by those numbers. Most mainstream media outlets put it down to his hubris based on three previous election victories, but those of us with an ear to the ground believe it is more likely a result of the premier’s growing Imbutain addiction.
So in the grasp of the rare South American pain killer/hallucinogenic Campbell is, according to some accounts, delusional and out of touch with reality. He has, so the rumour goes, taken to calling midnight cabinet/prayer meetings and has even flirted with the idea of changing his name to Amour De Cosmos (Lover of the Universe).
Oddly enough, or perhaps not, most people would be more likely to vote for Amour De Cosmos than Campbell, so his handlers should encourage the name change not dissuade him.
Well politics in B.C are interesting if nothing else, many of my Ontario friends, which is pretty much all of them (all two), always ask what makes B.C politics so wacky, so goofy, so completely out there and why do we vote for these people?
Yes there is a tone of superiority from my Upper Canada friends who have migrated to B.C, apparently so they can constantly remind us how much better things are in Ontario. They prefer the central Canada approach to politics, electing an unexpressive and unemotional premier who resembles a marble statue of all previous premiers (and in one case it actually was a statue, apparently they lost track), about once every 10 years, who does what all the rest have done and so on and so forth.
“It’s boring but at least it’s predictable,” they say. What’s so great about boring and predictable? I’m looking forward to the last days of the Campbell regime as the legions of VanZalmer supporters storm the Fuhrer Bunker underneath the legislature building, who knows what crazy last minute edicts Campbell will issue.
Of course that’s supposing his alleged Imbutain addiction won’t get the best of him before 2013 and there will still be a Campbell to kick around. You see that’s the problem, you never realize how much you miss someone until they’re gone. And when Campbell is banished from public life to quietly snort rails of Imbutain in between drinks on the cocktail circuit, we’ll miss him…yes we’ll miss ridiculing him, but there will never be a better and more deserving target of our ridicule, sigh, all good things do come to an end.
